Trying to Understand

She Will Not Be Quiet: A (mostly unedited) daily writing practice

This one feels extra vulnerable. I spent time, a lot of necessary time with these words. Thank you for taking your time here. Here’s to… Breathing peace. Breathing peace. Breathing peace.

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Trying to Understand

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It's only 9:00 am and, after accidentally 
allowing myself to get hijacked 
by the news, I have forgotten 
that I have a body. 

I have forgotten to notice 
that I am warm and fed 
and safe inside my own home, 
that my people are warm 
and fed and safe.

I have forgotten 
that I get to choose. That I still 
get to choose. That my 
beloved daughters still
get to choose.

But, I can't forget 
that so many are not 
warm or fed or safe 
inside their homes. I can't 
forget that so many 
do not 
get to choose.

On the other side 
of the room, the dog 
sighs. And I notice 
that I have been holding 
my breath. 

I breathe. 

When I was two and a half years old,
my mom says that I used to repeat 
the words: 

Mommy, I don't understand. 
Mommy, I don't understand 
(over and over and over again). 

And now, I am here 
53 years later, 
sitting at my kitchen table 
repeating 
the same words.

How 

can it be okay for a select few 
in fancy suits 
to hoard billions and billions 
of dollars when there are human beings 
all over the world dying of hunger—

human beings with empty
bellies sleeping on sidewalks 
on cold, cold nights.

How can anyone claim 
to care for our children    
     and still refuse 
to do everything 
in their power to protect
them from guns? The same guns 
that murder so many of our beloveds.

How, when our planet 
is so very, very sick, 
do fancy suits strip away the vital 
protections that could save this place, 
this place this gives us 
everything.

How do people entangle 
with ideologies that have dismissed, 
disregarded, discarded, massacred 
millions 
and millions?

Mommy, I don't understand.

Kindness. 
Compassion. 
Love. 

Three essentials 
that don't cost a cent. The only 
essentials that will save us. 

The only 
essentials 
that make sense.

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NOTE: I have kept the comment section open today.

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Registration is now open for my next Write Yourself Free Series.

Please click below for more information & to register.

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Signed copies of my book STAYING IN LOVE & signed poetry prints are available HERE.

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Today is day 17 of posting my daily writings. These writings live at the below link.

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